Power ( Part-16 ) - The Power of Attitude
Good Day Readers, Today we will be discussing the Last Point of this Topic "Power" which is "The Power of Attitude"
Who's the worst person you can negotiate for?
Yourself.
You do a much better job negotiating for someone else.
Why?
Because you take yourself too seriously in any interaction that concerns you. You care too much about yourself. That puts you under pressure and stress. When you negotiate for someone else, you're more relaxed.
You're more Objective. You don't care as much, because you regard the situation as Fun or as a Game- which it is.
This Characteristic of Caring Too much when we're Personally involved is True with all of us.
Recently I was asked to handle a large Financial Negotiation for a Major Bank Overseas. the Transaction involved millions of Dollars, and everyone was uptight --- Except me. I was relaxed, enjoying the Trip and thinking Clearly.
Do you know why I was so calm with so much at stake? It was the Bankers who had the stake---not me. If everything went wrong they could lose millions, and were I them (Knowing me as I do). I would have worried also.
As for myself, I was getting paid by the day, so my attitude was, "Another day, Another Dollar." I viewed their Big Financial Negotiation as a Game---as Fun. Oh, I cared---but I didn't care that much.
Yet when I returned home to my daughter's report card, the Games and Fun were over. The Family Transaction around the kitchen table was serious, and because I cared so much I'm not sure that I did as well at home as I had overseas.
Try to regard all encounters and situations, including your Job, as a Game, as the world of Illusion. Pull back a little and enjoy it all. Do your best, but don't fall apart if everything doesn't pan out the way you'd like it to.
Remember that things are seldom what they seem. Even skim milk masquerades as cream, and as Oscar Levant once said, " When you strip away the phony tinsel, what do you find underneath? The Real Tinsel."
Train yourself to say in every one of your Negotiations, "If everything goes wrong, will my Life End?"
If the answer to this question is no, teach yourself to say, "Big Deal," "Who cares?" and "So What?"
Develop the attitude of Caring- but not caring that much. To paraphrase Eugene O'Neill, "This episode is but a strange interlude in the electrical display of God the Father."
If you develop this healthy, somewhat amused, "It's a Game" attitude toward all your negotiation encounters, both on and off the job, 3 benefits will follow:
- You'll have considerably more energy, because you'll always have energy to do things you enjoy doing. (You've undoubtedly experienced utter fatigue at the end of a grueling day, only to find the fatigue replaced by explosive vitality when someone suggests you do something that you regard as a Game- or Fun)
- You'll be under reduced stress. There will be less uric acid in your bloodstream, and the tendency toward hypertension will diminish. You can knock off some of the jogging you do, because your Physical Condition will Improve. (If your Job becomes Fun, your Anxiety will drop to the level you experience in a Challenging Game of Ping-Pong.)
- You'll get better Results, because your attitude will convey your feeling of Power and Mastery of your Life. (You will Transmit a confidence indicative of options, and people will start following you.)
Ironically, on of the more visible practitioners of this attitude is a Media Minister. The Reverend Ike, star of TV and Radio, attracts a wide following with his message and unorthodox style.
He preaches " Green Power" and frequently urges his audience to " Give God a Great Big Hand."
One day he was walking among the people of his congregation and repeating over and over, "Don't worry. There's nothing to be concerned about"
A Parishioner raised his hand and said, "Reverend Ike ... you don't understand. I have a serious problem. I am worried."
The Reverend Responded with cool demeanor, "Well, forget it."
"No, no! I can't ... it's Serious and I'm Worried."
"So tell me," said the Reverend. "What could possibly trouble you so much?"
"It's the Bank," declared the parishioner. " I owe the Bank $6000. The Loan is due Tomorrow. I don't have any part of it, and I am Really Worried."
Reverend Ike didn't miss a beat. " My Good Man, why are you worried? it's that bank that has a Serious Problem!"
Although I have a Nagging Suspicion that the Reverend Ike's guidance was a take-off on an old joke, there is a great deal to be said for this attitude.
We've put Power under a Magnifying Glass. Now let us Review again those 3 Crucial Variables present in every Negotiation.
- Power
- Time
- Information
It's Time to Look at:
"Time"
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