Manipulating Manipulators
Dear Readers, We have approached to our Last Chapter "Manipulating Manipulators" and "Strategies for Dealing with Manipulators".
Finally, this is something you can work on to completely derail someone who is trying to manipulate you - learn how to give them taste of their own medicine.
One of the most satisfying experiences in this arena would be to catch someone completely off guard while they are in the middle of a scheme that makes them feel superior to you.
Mirror the Manipulator
One way to pull this off is to practice the Art of Mirroring yourself in the context of a public gathering.
Now that you know how a manipulator works, you can conduct an experiment when you feel that someone is trying to use flattery and mirroring to get on your good side.
To do this, simply employ the personality of someone other than yourself. Perhaps you tell jokes with exaggerated enthusiasm or adopt a super serious affect.
If the person who approaches you chooses to mirror these aspects, you will notice right away because of the jarring difference between the personality you've chosen and the personality being mirroring before you.
At an integral moment in the conversation, switch gears to convey your own personality, and see how this person responds.
If they are thrown off, the odds are, they were trying to mirror you, and now, they don't know what to do. If they are smart, they will realize what is happening and high-tail it away from you in embarrassment. It is like this person won't be bothering you again.
Be Immune to the Manipulator's Charms
Another way to shut down a manipulator is simply to refuse to let them get under your skin. A manipulator trying to seduce you by charming you or get you angry to prompt an outburst, make you feel guilty, make you cry, or cave in are all tactics employed by the Dark Psychology user.
You will be able to throw the frustration on their faces when they realize that their tactics are not going to work on you as you keep a straight face and a cool demeanor. Granted, this is easier said than done.
In order to enforce this kind of awareness and control over your emotions, you must first really get in touch with and address those areas of vulnerability you see in yourself.
If you are someone who empathizes and cries easily when you see others in pain, it is important to be aware that this particular vulnerability can be taken advantage of in certain circumstances.
If a complete stranger approaches you and starts right in on a sob story, then it would be wise to not give in with your emotions before you can verify its information onto you.
If the context is inappropriate, then your senses should be telling you that this person might not have the most ethical intentions.
Be Aware of Your Emotions
The bottom line here is that the best way to undermine a manipulator and throw his own tactics to his face is to remain in control and fully aware of your own emotional state.
Even if it means behaving in a way that seems rude or impolite, take a moment to really think about where this particular anxiety comes from.
Do you genuinely feel that defending yourself and putting up an emotional guard in certain ways is inherently "Rude", or did you just buy into that idea based on what other people tell you or convey to you?
What is in your best interest? Let these arguments serve you through lines of reason and personal judgement before letting other people or society tell you what is and is not appropriate in social contexts.
Don't ever fall for the feeling of obligation that may lead you into a situation where you feel uncomfortable. If you've been invited to a party full of strangers and something feels off, then leave.
It's as simple as that. Don't fret about what your friend will think about you or what people will say.
Your Safety Comes First
A word of caution before getting overly defensive or confronting a Dark Psychology User is imperative here as we close this Article. The very nature of a manipulator is that their emotions have some degree of volatility, and you can never know exactly how someone is going to react.
Especially if you are in a situation where you are alone with the manipulator, think twice before throwing their tactics to their face.
It might be wiser to play the game until you have a chance to call someone for help or get support from someone, including the police, in order to remove yourself from the situation.
The scenarios will vary, and you could be in a public setting, like a party or club, and you simply wish to make it clear that you are not a good target for the manipulator's schemes.
Use your common sense and judgement in these situations, and remember that even though it might make you feel good about yourself by exposing the Manipulator, it is Never Worth putting yourself or others in Danger.
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